Friday, November 9, 2012

SILENT TEARS


There are thousands of children in our country today that are crying silent tears.  You may not recognize these tears as they come in different forms.  Drug abuse can be a form of silent tears.  Cutting one's self or alcoholism is another form of silent tears.  Silent tears manifests itself in a hundred different ways.  Stealing, murder, suicide and the list goes on of the ways these children are crying silent tears. 

What would cause so many tears to fall silently and us not even be aware of the depth of the pain and sorrow in these children's lives?  There are close to three million children in our country that are experiencing these silent tears.  Many of these children seem to be loved and cared for dearly.  They seem to come from wonderful homes of parents that are outstanding citizens but yet the silent tears still fall. 

We need to stop and evaluate these children's lives and see what is going on.  Their father, mother, aunt, uncle or cousin may be or may have taken advantage of them sexually, causing them to be living in torment.  Many of them have been threatened, beaten, and mentally abused and eventually these children fall into the trap of acceptance.  They don't talk about it because of the threats, the fear, or the outbreaks of abuse.  These children are not allowed to cry out loud but yet if you listen closely, you can hear the cries. 

A child that has been or is being sexually abused will start acting out.  There may be outbreaks of anger.   These children may start stealing, fighting or if old enough turn to drugs or alcohol.  This was not the path they wanted to take for their lives but they are not allowed to pour their hearts out, not allowed to weep over or talk about this abuse and therefore, it eats a hole in these children's lives. 

I have spoken with woman in their fifty's that have cried silently for forty years.  Once they were grown they could have spoken out but they had learned by that time to compress it so deep that even as an adult they couldn't break free from the silent tears.  As they grew older the sore ate away more and more of their heart until one day they found themselves in the doctor's office weeping, shaking and out of control.  Medication was prescribed but what their soul really needed was to be set free. 

If you have experienced sexual abuse you need to break the chain of bondage.  You didn't tie yourself up but the abuse itself put you into shackles.  You have drug those shackles to every town you lived in, every school you attended and you have even taken the shackles to church with you. 

It is now time to get the hack saw out and be set free.  The very first step to being set free is to admit to yourself that this horrible thing has happened to you.  Free yourself from guilt, shame and self blame.  It was not your fault.  You didn't ask for this to happen.  You are not the one that needs to carry the guilt so pull out the old hack saw and cut that chain loose.  Deal with the shame and self blame the same way.  Cut the chains loose, let them fall, and turn your back on them and walk away.  You are now free to move forward.

The second thing to do is absolutely the hardest but you need to talk to someone who is trustworthy and tell them about this horrible event or events.  You may find yourself curled up in a ball, physically ill or even feeling thoughts of suicide as you open up and reveal the abuse.  You may actually start throwing up.  It is normal to go through any or all of these effects during the first time you speak of the abuse.  Don't stop talking, if you do you only allow the chains to be tied right back onto your body, weighing your soul, body and spirit down to the point that you can't function.

The third thing is to continue to deal with it verbally and seek guidance from the Lord in the healing process.  Songs of praise or healing can be very instrumental in healing the silent tears.  Christ is there for you, he longs to set you free.  Scriptures on healing or comfort can also be part of the healing process.  Whatever you have to do to keep moving forward, then that's what you need to set your mind on accomplishing.

Fear is the greatest thing to overcome.  Nearly always, the fear has been planted by the person that inflicted the abuse, and most of the time it is artificial, just a way to silence the person.  This fear can be so great that the child or even the adult can't move past it, frozen in their steps weeping silent tears.  Go ahead and jump in and get rid of the chains.  Once this first step is taken the other steps are much easier. 

II TIMOTHY 1:7
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear;
but of power,
and of love,
and of a sound mind.
 
Once you have admitted to someone the abuse and you start to move forward in your life the following scripture will be helpful.  Do not ever go back and let the shackles be placed back on you.  You have been set free so stay that way.  You will have a tendency to go back to the bondage.  When you see that happening,  leave it there, do not pick it up.  It's in the past.  
 
GALATIANS 5:1
Stand fast therefore in the liberty
wherewith Christ hath made us free,
and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.

JEREMIAH 29:11-13
For I know the thoughts
that I think toward you,
saith the LORD,
thoughts of peace,
and not of evil,
to give you an expected end.
Then shall ye call upon me,
and ye shall go and pray unto me,
and I will hearken unto you.
And ye shall seek me,
and find me,
when ye shall search for me
with all your heart
 
EPHESIANS 3:14-21
For this cause I bow my knees unto the
Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
Of whom the whole family
in heaven and earth is named,
That he would grant you,
according to the riches of his glory,
to be strengthened with might
by his Spirit in the inner man;
That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith;
that ye,
being rooted and grounded in love,
May be able to comprehend
with all saints what is the breadth,
and length, and depth, and height;
And to know the love of Christ,
which passeth knowledge,
that ye might be filled with
all the fulness of God.
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding
abundantly above all that we ask or think,
according to the power that worketh in us,
Unto him be glory in the church
by Christ Jesus throughout all ages,
world without end. Amen.

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